SPECIAL OFFER. Sign up for our all new health care reform and one bridge will be thrown in at no added charge. It is a marvelous reform that will save your economy from that troublesome and embarrassing bankruptcy I see coming. Supplies are limited. You must act quickly. If you question the details of the reform or my motives you will be attacked as a racist traitor by my people masquerading as objective journalists. A small carrying charge of $10,000,000,000.00 must be paid to the union thugs of my choosing. Those who are thoroughly tired of Grandma will be especially happy with the devil I put in the details.
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